Despair and Hope

The Nightmare Returns

A while ago I celebrated the news that Celebrity Big Brother was to be axed, only for my joy to be somewhat tempered by the news that it was only to be axed for 2008.

Come 2008 and I have the same feelings in the reverse, with the news that in fact it was not axed, merely changed in format bringing the despair before the silver lining of the news that it's viewing figures have collapsed and the notable lack of interest in proceedings in the pubs of the Village.

OK, still over 3 million did watch but, just like all those lawyer jokes end and with apologies to Jackart, it's a good start.

That said, perhaps the new format, where I understand that the celebrities set tasks for the house mates, does show some promise. It could even, for the first time, make me seek celebrity.

"So...you've got the extension lead and the toaster?"

"That's good...and you are sure that everything is plugged in?"

"Yes, that is when it is all red and glowing inside."

"Now...you know how you were complaining that the water in the bath wasn't hot enough..."

This assumes of course the non-availability of an accessible gas main and hacksaw.

The best news of all is that five minutes after reading the BBC article I've already forgotten the names of all involved, so my count of known contestants remains proudly on three.

Lines of Thought

One of the hazards of working from home is that you do on occasion expose yourself to daytime TV. It's one of those things that does make me sceptical about the BBC's oft repeated claims to be the last bastion of 'quality' TV, but occasionally you do catch the odd gem.

So here, in tribute to Private Eye's Dumb Britain feature, is a snippet from today's Weakest Link:

Ann Robinson: What 'T' is a gland at the rear of the mouth, often removed in childhood.

Contestant: The Throat.

Source: The Weakest Link (8th November 2007)

Now I've encountered a few kids who I think would benefit from a thoatectomy, but...

Update, early hours: Yes, it is embarrassing to f*** up the title of a posting like this, OK? Most of my 'lines of thought' are polluted with 'lines of though', so maybe it wasn't such a bad title anyway.

Dashed Hopes

Only a temporary reprieve

How my spirits soared when I saw the headline "Celebrity Big Brother Axed" on the SkyNews website. Sadly the title soon changed to "Celebrity Big Brother 2008 Axed" and it transpired that the nightmare is scheduled to return after a year's hiatus; I suppose it would only have been a single drop gone from the ocean of mindless reality TV programming, but I guess every little helps.

Sadly I'm sure the public's addiction to such mind-numbing crap will continue unabated for some time to come, as will the broadcaster's willingness to fill the gaps in the schedules that the ever increasing bandwidth available to them creates. Every year brings it's own fresh crop of 'Celebrity X, Y and Z' and each year X, Y and Z become either more bizarre or more anodyne.

What I really struggle to think of is any case of a broadcaster whose increasing range of channels has brought with it any real increase in total quality output, other than those that have opted basically to have a re-runs channel. I've even had to go and check that ITV4 is actually available on Freeview because of upcoming Rugby World Cup coverage, so disinterested have I become in its ilk.